Breaking Bad

Breaking Bad is unremarkable.

6 out of 10

 

I'll start by saying that my opinion will not be a popular one. Walter White has audiences and critics swooning. For the life of me, I cannot figure out why.

 

The show follows the life of Walter White, an underachieving chemist who is diagnosed with cancer and begins to cook meth with his former student, and drug addict, Jesse Pinkman. Turns out, their product is the purest ever and the two begin a dark journey to keep their business a secret and their loved ones safe.

 

Long ago I sat down to watch the first 2 episodes. I was not impressed. "Keep watching," they insisted. I was frequently told that it gets good later. It was actually quite comical, people even gave me the exact episode that changed their opinion. For example: "season 2, episode 8 is where it gets good." I can assure you the episode was nothing special.

 

The acting is inconsistent, ranging from riveting to barely passable (I think Aaron Paul was told to throw the words "b***h" and "yo" into his character's dialogue, a power he abuses.). Characters are also inconsistent, acting and behaving completely normal one episode and insane the next. I get that facing your own death and being in high pressure situations is stressful but it just gets exhausting. For example, Walt is fine and then the next episode he is completely insane, chasing a fly around his lab for the full 45 min (season 3, episode 10 aka one of the worst episodes of TV ever). Then the next episode, he is completely fine again!

 

Direction is adequate, occasionally pretentious. The whole black and white extended foreshadowing in season 2 was stupid, especially considering the event it leads up to which makes the whole thing feel like a waste of time. Breaking Bad is at its best when it remains modest.

 

Breaking Bad assumes that it is tense viewing. Many scenes have intense music and it assumes I am on the edge of my seat. It is wrong. I only felt any sort of tension thrice throughout the whole series (yes, I kept track). Perhaps, that was due to my lack of attachment to the characters but it didn't do much for me.

 

So what is it about Breaking Bad that makes it so widely loved? If I had to guess, I'd say it was the edge. This show is more edgy and gritty than some of the other shows on television (especially in its early seasons). However, it isn't too edgy in that most teens are able to tolerate it. Thus, it has become a rite of passage, of sorts.

 

It isn't bad, it just isn't that good. I know what you're thinking, who am I to disagree with all of your friends and every critic out there? I'm Skylar, and I write the purest reviews this side of the Mississippi. Remember my name.

 

Breaking Bad is rated TV-MA

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Tags: Breaking Bad, Bad, Breaking, TV-MA, tvma, drama, amc, television, 

22 Jump Street is very funny but occasionally overwhelms with idiocy.

7.75 out of 10

 

The sequel to the reboot of the television show (that you didn't even know existed) has hit theaters! Check out the trailer here:

Let's get it out of the way. Acting is fine. Direction is adequate. Who cares? The only thing that matters is the humor. Is it funny? Absolutely! The movie had me in stitches... at times. At other times, the jokes made me roll my eyes so hard I was unsure if they would ever return to their normal position... but in the best way possible. The movie blends three types of humor, all of which are featured in the trailer.

 

Type 1: Slapstick idiocy

This is a type of humor I have little respect for and causes the majority of my eye-rolling. This was expertly illustrated by the attack of the octopus and Jonah Hill screaming, "IT'S INKING IN MY MOUTH!" Can it illicit a chuckle? Perhaps, but it doesn't quite belong in this comic palace.

 

Type 2: Raunchy humor

It's not that raunchy humor is any more complicated than slapstick idiocy... I just think it is funnier. When the guy in prison starts screaming, "I'm Eric's b***h... THIS A*S IS YOURS!" it is kinda funny... but it doesn't compare to type 3.

 

Type 3: Self-satire

The movie is at its best when it laughs at itself. I absolutely love it! "Ladies, nobody cared about the Jump Street reboot... but you got lucky. So now this department has invested A LOT of money to make sure Jump Street keeps going." The movie is filled with clever jokes, poking fun at the shortcomings of sequels and then succeeding wildly.

 

With enough comedy and action to satisfy most audience members, 22 Jump Street is a satisfying sequel and is worth the price of admission.

 

22 Jump Street is rated R for language throughout, sexual content, drug material, brief nudity and some violence. 

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Tags: 22 jump street, comedy, action, r

The Fault in Our Stars is well-made but struck a nerve with me.

5.5 out of 10 

 

In his review of the film, Bill Goodykoontz of the Arizona Republic said, "If you don't cry or snort or at least tear up a little at some point during Josh Boone's film version of the popular young-adult novel by John Green, you're a pretty cold fish."

 

Well Mr. Goodykoontz, I suppose I am the coldest of fish.

 

Check out the trailer here:

And as I re-watch the trailer, I want to love this movie... but I simply do not. Believe me, there is nothing I love more than being emotionally destroyed by a movie but this one came nowhere close.

 

As far as movies go, this one is well made. The director clearly knew what he was doing and the way text messages and emails are incorporated into the movie is very cute. Acting wise, I have no major complaints. Both leads were great and did a solid job bringing the characters to life.

 

I did read the book. In fact, I binge read it in a 24 hour, insomnia ridden period. I walked into school the following day and voiced my discontent with the book. I had found myself getting very annoyed with the characters, but attributed that to my lack of sleep. But, by the end of the book, I felt nothing and I frankly felt like a jerk. I still had every intention of seeing the movie and hoped that actually seeing the story unfold would help bring the emotion to life. It did, in a very miniscule way. However, as soon as I walked out of the theater, I made eye contact with one of my friends, smiled, and said, "I hated it." She did too. I find something about this movie very off-putting, so much so that I considered getting up and walking out thrice.

 

Rotten Tomatoes, my movie review bible, gives this movie an 82% and calls it, "Wise, funny, and heartbreaking."

 

Let's start there!

 

Is it funny? Not really. It tries to lighten the mood but I didn't really laugh once. I was further frustrated when the theater was filled with giggles when characters stared at each other. I kid you not, every time the characters stared at each other for more than 2 seconds, the audience would giggle! Because I find the characters so unfunny, every joke they make seemed distasteful, which made me think the characters were mean, even though they clearly weren't trying to be. To the movie's credit, making jokes about dying of cancer as a teen is a difficult job. However, "cancer perks", certain perks kids with cancer receive, are not funny.

 

If its goal was to make teenage girls cry, it succeeded. The last half hour of the movie could barely be heard over the sea of sniffles and sobs that surrounded me. However, I wasn't heartbroken. I mean, I saw the tragedy coming a mile away.  We all did! When it finally comes, it's "whatever". One of my friends expertly stated something along the lines of, "The tragedy isn't in their love but rather the fact they are dying at such a young age." In that case, I suppose I understand a little more.

 

As for wisdom, it has more than most of the movies marketed at teenagers. The part I found most intriguing about this movie was the idea of family life continuing after losing a child to cancer. The idea of death is a heavy one to handle and this movie does a pretty good job with it. It doesn't really discuss anything particularly insightful but was thought-provoking, in that I caught myself starting off into space and thinking more than once. So while the movie doesn't really provide any great wisdom, it may make you think a little more than most movies.

 

One of my biggest problems was with the "ultra-dreamy" Augustus Waters, the leading man. One of my friends described him as "too perfect." Indeed. He walks around annoyingly and impossibly happy. He says ridiculous things like, "It would be a pleasure to have my heart broken by you, Hazel Grace." And don't even get me started on his cigarette metaphor. The one thing I like about him is his obsession with leaving his mark on the world. A concept that was glossed over, much to my despair.

 

Is it terrible? Absolutely not. Is it overhyped? Absolutely. If you think you'll enjoy it, I recommend you see it. You'll probably enjoy it! I just had some issues with the material itself. Don't judge me for that! Okay?

 

Okay.

 

The Fault in Our Stars is rated PG-13 for thematic elements, some sexuality and brief strong language. 

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Tags: drama, comedy, PG-13, pg13, the fault in our stars, fault, stars, romance